Subject: Fw: THE RURAL AUSTRALIA THESAURUS OF COMPUTER TERMINOLOGY

 

Some new meanings for every day computer talk

Trust you enjoy them . 

Greg 

 

THE RURAL AUSTRALIA THESAURUS OF COMPUTER TERMINOLOGY
>Log On - Make the barbecue hotter
>Log Off - The barbecue is too hot
>Monitor - Keeping an eye on the barbecue
>Download - Get the firewood off the ute
>Hard drive - Trip back home without any cold tinnies
>Floppy Disc - What you get lifting too much firewood at once
>Keyboard - Where you hang the ute and bike keys
>Window - What you shut when it's cold
>Screen - What you shut in the mosquito season
>Byte - What mosquitoes do
>Bit - What mosquitoes did
>Mega Byte - What Townsville mosquitoes do
>Chip - A bar snack
>Micro Chip - What's left in the bag after you have eaten the chips
>Modem - What you did to the lawns
>Dot Matrix - Old Dan Matrix's wife
>Laptop - Where the cat sleeps
>Software - Plastic knives and forks you get at Big Rooster
>Hardware - Real stainless steel knives and forks from K Mart
>Mouse - What eats the grain in the shed
>Mainframe - What holds the shed up
>Web - What spiders make
>Web Site - The shed or under the verandah
>Cursor - The old bloke who swears a lot
>Search Engine - What you do when the ute won't go
>Yahoo - What you say when the ute does go
>Upgrade - A steep hill
>Server - The person at the pub that brings out the counter lunch
>Mail Server - The bloke at the pub that brings out the counter lunch
>User - The neighbour who keeps borrowing things
>Network - When you have to repair your fishing net
>Internet - Complicated fish net repair method
>Netscape - When fish manoeuvres out of reach of net
>Online - When you get the laundry hung out
>Off Line - When the pegs don't hold the washing up.