Gregs Jokes

Trust you enjoy these little bits of wisdom
Regards Greg

> >

Subject: FW: Words to live by

> > The secret of a good sermon is to have a good
> > beginning and a good ending; and to have the
> > two as close together as possible. ~ George Burns

> >

> > Be careful about reading health books. You may
> > die of a misprint. ~ Mark Twain

> >

> > I once had a rose named after me and I was very flattered.
> > But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalogue . . . "No
> > good in a bed, but fine against a wall."
> > ~ Eleanor Roosevelt

> >

> > Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest
> > woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited
> > by her sister . . . and now wish to withdraw that statement.
> > ~ Mark Twain

> >

> > Santa Claus has the right idea .. Visit people only
> > once a year. ~ Victor Borge

> >

> > What would men be without women?
> > Scarce, sir . . . mighty scarce. ~ Mark Twain

> >

> > By all means, marry.
If you get a good wife, you'll  become happy;
if you get a bad one, you'll become
 a philosopher. ~ Socrates

> >

> > I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. ~ Groucho Marx

> >

> > My wife has a slight impediment in her speech.
Every now and then she stops to breathe. ~ Jimmy Durante

> >
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