Subject: Fw: Sad! 
 

Subject: Senior's Humour

A doctor was addressing a large audience in Tampa, Florida.
"The material that we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most
of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your
stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be
disastrous and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs
in our drinking water. But there is one thing that is the most dangerous
of all and we all have, or will in the future, eat it. Can anyone here
tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years
after eating it?"
After several seconds of quiet, a 75 year old man in the front of the
audience raised his had and softly said, "Wedding Cake."
 

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Thought I'd let my doctor check me,
'Cause I didn't feel quite right. . .
All those aches and pains annoyed me
And I couldn't sleep at night.

He could find no real disorder
But he wouldn't let it rest.
What with Medicare and Blue Cross,
We would do a couple tests.

To the hospital he sent me
Though I didn't feel that bad.
He arranged for them to give me
Every test that could be had.

I was fluoroscoped and cystoscoped,
My aging frame displayed.
Stripped, on an ice cold table,
While my gizzards were x-rayed.

I was checked for worms and parasites,
For fungus and the crud,
While they pierced me with long needles
Taking samples of my blood.

Doctors came to check me over,
Probed and pushed and poked around,
And to make sure I was living
They then wired me for sound.

They have finally concluded,
Their results have filled a page.

What I have will someday kill me;
My affliction is OLD AGE

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